AWD was just perusing the net web after a full weekend of slaying evil jihadist deer in the woods of north Texas and came across a few photos of the type that every male who ever wants to reel in the biscuit with a young lovely should avoid taking at any cost. Even at the threat of being made to covert to Islam or getting your head-bone disconnected from your neck bone or taking a photo like this….better to end up on Youtube with your melon sitting on your chest! At least your relatives can say you went out a hero rather than a poofter-looking girly man. (Warning, these are quite painful)

Great googly moogly that’s gay! I’m sure those two Obama voters love them some puppies and all but they couldn’t look more effeminate if they were photographed giving Barry Manilow a wash, set, and manicure after whipping up a marvelous souffle…in the nude…with Elton John looking on.

Before AWD became a supa-famous international blogging sensation, the Big Sexy used to have a bunch of employees he managed when he was just a regular cat working for the man (who held me down!). We’d have an annual meeting some damn where every year and all the management types and their lowly employees subordinates would attend. The company would hand out a company logo shirt and take a group photo of all the attendees together on the last day of the meetings wearing the stupid shirt. AWD would instruct his lowly surrogates, “every year some damn body will wear his stupid logo shirt tomorrow instead of the last day when he’s supposed to wear it. Don’t be that guy! If you wear the stupid logo shirt tomorrow, I will hunt you, I will find you, and I will kill you.” It’s the same with photos like this:

Now, I know some of you dudes on AWD have a cat for some reason or another. So I’m going to try and tread lightly here. I don’t really know why you have a cat unless you’ve run out of targets….but to each his own. Just know, if I ever get my meat hooks on a photo of any of y’all like Lance above, I will terrorize your ass forever by posting it every damn where I can find on the net web!

Here’s another:

Holy bejeezus! That’s just pitiful. Maybe he’s old and has something wrong with him…like being a liberal (which pretty much goes without saying) or something. Or maybe he was just cold and wanted that fat bastid cat to warm him up by the way he’s cuddling up to that thing. But look at the expression on that cat’s face. Looks like he just crapped all over the old liberal. I’m telling ya, that cat is evil, man. Evil!

If I haven’t made my point yet, just check out this last one:

This is just so wrong on so many levels. First, unless you’re a Dale Earnhardt fan or live in Aynor, South Carolina, it’s time to lose that mullet, junior. If you do live in Aynor and are an Ironhead fan with a mullet, you’re probably the mayor! Also time to trash those Members Only jackets, too! You look like Ahmadinejad for heaven’s sake! Actually, that guy in the photo looks like a guy who would torture and kill cats. So ladies, stay the hell away from him! I’m pretty sure that won’t be a problem.

To all my pet-loving friends, it’s just hard to look manly taking a photo holding an animal…unless the animal is dead and has antlers and you’ve just shot it. Now, you could tie little antlers on a dead cat but it really wouldn’t fool anyone…except your fellow libtards. Now, maybe you’re not interested in attention from curvy fillies. If that’s the case, then you’re probably reading the wrong blog or have already been banned from commenting for being an obnoxious libtard. But a good AWD rule of thumb is this: when it comes to taking cute little photos of you lovingly holding your pets….DON’T BE THAT GUY! You’ll thank the Big Sexy later. I crap you negative.

Now, if you’re hell-bent on taking a photo of you holding something sweet and don’t have a Hooters girl stashed away somewhere….it is perfectly acceptable to take photos with your weapons. Unless you’re a wigger and look like this:

If you are a wigger who wants to make stupid photos with guns, then please follow the actions of this guy because you’re a disgrace to the race, Homes.

Hell, best advice here is don’t be any of these guys! Because if you are, there’s a great chance you will spend a lifetime holding your own…if you know what AWD means!

OPEN POST TIME. Feel free to send the AWD any gay pictures of yourself and your pet. Or you can keep discussing boring ol’ politics! You’re choice.

Music That Doesn’t Suck tonight is my favorite tune from one Steve Miller. Probably the only tune from Steve Miller I really like. I never cared too much for Steve…even though he’s from Texas…but this is one badass song and I never get tired of it. Here’s Serenade from some damn album that was released some damn year. And I never figured out what that “pompatoose of love” thing was. So there, Steve!

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39 Comments

  1. Kansas Gun Girl says:

    By the time I got to the line about strapping antlers on a cat, I had to stop and wipe tears out of my eyes for laughing so hard! The funniest thing I have read for awhile. Thanks for the laugh AWD!!! Keep ’em coming!!

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  2. My favorite line in this one is:

    ” I don’t really know why you have a cat unless you’ve run out of targets….but to each his own.”

    When you get old and flabby
    Get yourself a tabby
    If you run off to Mejico
    Get yourself a Calico
    The only reason to own a cat
    Is ’cause its better than a rat!

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  3. AWD is as silly as the guys featured in this article

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  4. Them first two photos would make a nice set of targets at my firing range. Easy to see and no rings required. Bet they’ed sell good. Boss would be nice also.

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  5. SPURWING PLOVER says:

    The cat in the first picture looks like it was to run away This doofus probibly belongs to PETA or donates money to them and the idiot with the gun in his mouth looks like the winner of the INSPECTOR CLUSUE HOW NOT TO HANDLE A GUN AWARD

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  6. I recognize one of the guys-the one withthegray sweater. His name is Claude Bawlls.

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  7. Had a stray cat until AWD put me on the gay watch list… killed it the next morning. Now all I have is a thirteen and a half pound dog… my best friend.

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  8. Yea…I’ve got 4 cats, and a 110 pound dog…..and a safe full of shit that goes bang. And not a single picture of me like those.

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  9. I never met a cat owner that I liked… no kidding. Im talking about those who own cats exclusively and dislike dogs.

    Cats remind me of ghetto welfare recipients.. they are ungrateful, indifferent, have an air of arrogance about them and are high maintenance unless you dont mind the smell

    I couldnt own a cat if I lost my mind and wanted to.. have two rotties who would consider it to be a chew toy LOL

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    • I have cats and they are the coolest animals. Its a shame that many poor cats have homo owners. I also have a Border Collie and a Golden Retriever. The retriever and the cats are buddies but the border collie not so much. I live on a farm so thats different from having a cat in the city. When I lived in LA I had 2 Wolves and a cat would have lasted about 10 seconds with them. I think the homos should stick with Poodles personally.

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  10. Caught the little bastard in a raccoon trap and decided he’d be a good barn cat. Felines have their place on a farm just like dogs and womerns. But those Nancy Boy pictures could be used in a video for Unknown’s “Your Man Is Gay”.

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  11. AOW, I would submit to you that you forgot one guy not to be like: The guy that owns one of those useless under-40lbs dustmop looking dogs. He’s the sort that probably dresses it up and takes it into grocery stores, too, even though it’s clearly not a service animal.

    Ick. As a lady, I’d rather have a guy with (one) cat than a guy with one of those yippy-yappy dogs.

    I personally own a Great Dane and a Pitt Bull. Do I worry about urban yoots invading mi casa while the husband and I am at work?

    NOPE. You might get in, but you won’t get out…

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  12. How communist subversives and anti-colonialist strangle a captitalist society

    6,125 Proposed Regulations and Notifications Posted in Last 90 Days–Average 68 per Day

    http://cnsnews.com/news/articl.....age-68-day

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  13. “You can have all of the water, food and medical supplies in the world and it won’t do you a bit of good if someone comes and takes them from you. Security has to be the first priority.” – Joe Nobody

    http://holdingyourground.com/

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v.....ature=plcp

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  14. Open post, so;
    Remember the ‘Kill Big Bird’ meme the demotards ran with?
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new.....e-boy.html
    Well, with ‘tickle me elmo’ molesting little boys… it doesn’t seem like such a bad isea, now does it?

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  15. The first two are Walt and Jesse from “Breaking Bad” which is a TV show. I think it’s meant to be ironic, since they’re a couple of evil miscreants in said show.

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  16. This F Troop Administration is going to take us off the economic cliff

    Strategic Relocation The Film FULL VERSION HQ

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ir1xj2oQ9nw

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  17. Actually the left [no capital ‘L’] does enough White bashing and Americans bashing, so Ill pass on the cyber bullying.

    Cheers.

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  18. 79firebirdman says:

    Toy Poodle, all the way. My wife and I have a 13 pound toy Poodle. He is so smart and funny, a regular ham. Muslims don’t like dogs: another reason to confirm they are not to be trusted and have a whole bunch of screws loose.

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    • Thats a great point… I dont trust anyone that hates dogs ( or mistreats them ) we have two rotties that are like children to me.. heck we had a pug too until he passed ( talk about a clown that made us laugh ) Its been over a year and we still miss him….

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  19. Kinda ashamed to say that my wife has a cat. Its black, A democrate, And mean as hell. When we have company, we warn everyone don`t try to touch the cat, it Bites ( had to declaw it totally ) but there`s always somebody that thinks they can tame the savage beast. and its always get the neosporin and bandaids. with my wife its the sweetist cat there is. even my dogs leave it alone, which we have three. sadly we are going to lose our Lab, he has cancer. hey buddy wanna steak tonight, how bout some Bacon. Sure you can have a peanutbutter cup. Max my Wiem and partner in crime is pissed at me because he dosen`t get any. I tell him when your dieing of cancer its steak everynight. Already decided to get a big red Dobe ( Gonna name him Reagan) All this love and no gay pictures, I guess some people have just been denutted. Never worn camo or Shot a Colt or rolled down the road in an F350 4×4 with bluegrass pumping in downtown Chicago.(Yeah I`m that cool) if I posed for a pic like that, I really think my wife would leave, When she got done laughing at me.

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    • So you say your wife has a cat thats black, a democrat ( relying on you to feed it ) and mean as hell (ungrateful for your benevolence )
      Are you sure you dont have an Obama voter as a pet?

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      • HA/HA Thats Funny, As far as the Meanness goes I think it has a screw loose, When we take her to the vet She has to enter through the back door and they put on Kevlar gloves, her screeching can be heard in the parking lot. Now that you mention it I think you are right.

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    • We have a black cat at work and we call him Toby. He is my welfare recipient. Every morning when I get to work he is waiting there crying and crying for me to feed him. There is another sneaky cat that steals his food sometimes and we call him Pedro.

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  20. Hilarious!

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  21. The first pic is a joke/promo picture for the TV show Breaking Bad (best show on TV IMO)

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  22. I love cats.

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  23. For anyone who doesn’t know……..

    The libtards were slamming the owner of Papa Johns Pizza calling him a “racist” because Papa Johns can not afford ObongoCare…….

    November 16th there is a “”buycott”” for Papa Jons Pizza……

    Anyone who can should purchase a pizza or something that they sell to support Papa Johns in the same way we supported Chic-Fil-A

    Nov. 16th support Papa Johns…….

    The libtards can go screw themselves

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  24. Just thought I’d help you out Big Sexy. The space cowboy speaks,”of the properties of love.” Deciphering hard to figure out song lyrics is something of an obsession of mine.

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  25. C’mon now AWD … Cats do serve a useful purpose…
    Three tacos and a fur hat.

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  26. The only cat I want to see is the Mtn Lion that grabs Nancy Pelosi by the neck and shakes her like a can of .22 ammo and then bites her neck and kills the bitch..

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  27. Cats – The Other white Meat “

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  28. Hey dumbass in the hat – pull the trigger !

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