Last week, five thousand blackbirds mysteriously died in Arkansas. A few days later, more massive bird die-offs occurred in other states. The massive fish kills occurred in several states. The mystery has not escaped the eye of the nations civil rights
extortionists groups. Several leading voices in the civil rights movement have expressed concern over possible racist causes in the massive kills.
Revrum Al Sharpton said at a news conference:
We are very suspicious and concerned at the massive number of deaths of blackbirds. What we find appalling is that there were no whitebirds that died. Not one cracka bird! And not one yellow tweety Asian bird either! It is time the rights of blackbirds are defended from whatever racist or group of racists killed those birds!
Personally, I am very suspicious of them tea party teabaggers. What symbol do teabaggers use at their rallies? That snakey flag. And what do a snake eat? That’s right! Birds. In this case, blackbirds! I rest my case!
The NAACP also weighed in on the curious incidents. Spokesperson Shantasha Jackson said:
We are putting our forces into place to protest this mysterious lynchings of blackbirds! The NAACP is working with our brothers and sisters in the NAABB…the National Association for the Advancement of Black Birds…to uncover the racists responsible for these blackbird deaths and immediately start seeking welfare programs and reparations for these birds that have long suffered the racism of America.
We have also spoken with our friends at the NAABSB…the National Association for the Advancement of Black Sea Bass to investigate the mysterious numbers of black sea bass that have recently been killed. Obviously, racists are behind this as no other races of fish were killed! No white perch or tuna, no German brown trout! Just thousands of black sea bass and one black marlin who got lost! Coincidence? I think not! We believe the radical racist Great White Sharks might be behind this!
Revrum Sharpton is in the process of assembling his team of professional protesters to march on the lakes of Arkansas to protest the killings of blackbirds and black sea bass. Revrum Sharpton said this concerning the upcoming marches:
We not sure if any sea bass are in Arkansas but we know there are lots of blackbirds and other black animals and insects. We are standing up for the rights of our brothers in the forest, lakes and seas who feel firsthand the effects of racism in America!
Sharpton also is preparing to file suit against the US Dept. of the Interior to compensate African Americans for the loss of the blackbirds.