NJ Senater Robert Menendez, a long-time critic of the outsourcing of US jobs by evil corporations, is caught up in a scandal concerning his own outsourcing of his prostitution jobs off-shore. Menendez is being investigated by the FBI for procuring the services of underage prostitutes in the Dominican Republic while ignoring the services of domestic underage prostitutes in America. While having sexy-time with underage hookers is standard operating procedures for most Democrats, Menendez has received criticism from domestic underage workers in the flippy-floppy bidness for taking his dollars abroad.
Speaking for underage American prostitutes, Tiffini Rodriguez said:
“While we underage prostitutes in America suffer through this difficult economy that is a result of the failed economic policies of George W Bush, we call on all Democrat politicians to remember to buy American. We are all suffering with this economic downturn and it is frustrating to see our services outsourced to off-shore underage prostitutes in the Dominican Republic.”
A spokesman for Senator Menendez said in a prepared statement:
“While everyone is struggling to make ends meet during this difficult Bush economy, Senator Menendez has found it cost effective to secure the services of Dominican underage prostitutes to keep his tingly parts happy. This, in no way, is to belittle the services of domestic underage prostitutes. No one in Congress, especially in the Democrat caucus, has done more to support the domestic underage prostitute industry than Senator Robert Menendez. At least since Senator Ted Kennedy passed away.”
Underage prostitute Rodriguez replied by saying:
“It’s clear that Senator Menendez has underage Latin fever and likes his boo-tay young and brown. But America is full of young LBFM’s (little brown f-ing machines) that can provide the freaky-deaky services enjoyed for years by the Senator. And at reasonable prices for said freaky-deaky services!
This is an outrage to see a Democrat Senator offshoring domestic puta services! His actions hurt American underage prostitution jobs in America by sending them to the Dominican Republic where there is little quality control and zero taxes are generated. Senator Menendez is clearly a greedy 1%er hypocrite who is unwilling to share the wealth with us domestic underage prostitutes!”
Senator Menendez could not be reached for comment as he had recently departed for the Dominican Republic with several fellow Democrats to investigate wildlife in that country. His office reported that Senator Menendez is interested in sharing various aspects of New Jersey’s Penal Code to keep the underage prostitute problem tied down in the Dominican Republic.
A recent check of business licenses procured in the Dominican Republic show a recent business named “Senator Bob’s Boo-Tay Excursions” created in November of 2012. The business is described as one that provides wildlife services in the Dominican Republic for Democrat politicians seeking recreation at very reasonable prices. The motto of Senator Bob’s Boo-Tay Excursions is “We guarantee to make your poll rise!” Some of the endorsements from satisfied clients included this:
“The quality and willingness of the underage girls provided by Senator Bob’s Boo-Tay Excursions surpassed my wildest dreams, if you can imagine that.” B. Clinton
“The variety of LBFM’s and their dexterity proves that Senator Bob really knows his underage girls! Even for an experienced afficiado of underage girls like myself!” H. Clinton