AWD has been perfectly clear in saying America needs no more Kennedys, Clintoons, nor Bushes. Hell is filled with Kennedys and is busy making room for Bubba and Hitlery in the spacious Democrat wing. George Herbert Walker Bush and George W Bush were tremendous disappointments and should grovel to the ground and beg for mercy from conservatives. After all, both Bushes both claimed to be conservatives and proved to be wussypants moderate RINOs.

So now the latest of the undending Bush herd, Jeb, thinks it’s his turn at sucking as a US president. So he’s reportedly considering a run for the presidency in 2016. This excites AWD only a little less than a proctology exam from Dr. Scissorhands! Or eating glass. It’s so hard to decide! I would like to ask Jeb Bush concerning him running for president the following: Haven’t Americans suffered enough?

What makes Bush the likely choice for the wussypants RINO Republican Party? Here’s what he said during the Republican primary this year:

“I used to be a conservative and I watch these debates and I’m wondering, I don’t think I’ve changed, but it’s a little troubling sometimes when people are appealing to people’s fears and emotion rather than trying to get them to look over the horizon for a broader perspective and that’s kind of where we are.”

If Jeb used to be a conservative, he’s a shoo-in for the Repubs! Just what we need! Another p*ssy who wants to make friends with liberals! Sorry, Jeb! Republicans don’t need more of your type! They’re all filled up with wussies! They need some testosterone! And you appear to be severely lacking in that department!

The current mindset of the RINO Republican elite is to go all in to attract Latino voters. And Jeb Bush hablars Espanol…so he just has to be the nominee!! Or Marco Rubio, who is proving to be more and more RINOstic every day. Hussein got 70-odd percent of Hispanic votes in 2012 and the RINOs are peeing in their lacy, pink panties! Even when election results show that Romney lost because he didn’t close the deal with conservatives! Heaven forbid Republicans actually nominate a conservative! It would just be awful for them to actually win!

There is only one group in America that hates Tea Party conservatives more than the Democrats. The wussypants Republicans. They redistricted Allen West out of office and refused to help Michelle Bachmann and Steve King with their reelections because those leaders wouldn’t kow tow 100% of the time to Boehner and his crowd. The RINOs do not tolerate conservatives easily. So it’s not surprising Jeb Bush would throw his RINO sombrero into the ring and it’s not surprising the RINO elite would force him on Republicans like they did Romney.

One small problem. I promise you…even if it turns Al Sharpton white…AWD will NEVER, EVER, EVER vote for Jeb Bush! There is not one chance I will even consider it! And I know there are millions of me out there who will also sit out the next presidential election if Bush is on the Republican ticket! I crap you negative!

So AWD was thinking of things I’d rather do than vote for Jeb Bush:

  • Move to Detroit and begin my new rap career as MC Cracka
  • Have a long makeout session with Whoopi Goldberg with Kenny G playing on the stereo
  • Invite Michael Moore to my house for dinner
  • Attend a Alec Baldwin/Susan Sarandon/Sean Penn movie fest
  • Turn in my guns and join the Brady Foundation
  • Get a cat for a pet and name him Mr. Mittens
  • Turn in all my cowboy boots and wear nothing but Birkenstocks with socks
  • Pull for those comm-a-nist, blue-scumbelly Tarholes from UNC
  • Sell my family members to be used for medical experiments in North Korea
  • Accept Allah and start blowing the sh*t out of everything…including my favorite gun range

Any longtime readers realize by reading the previous bullet points that AWD will NEVER, EVER vote for Jeb Bush.  I have less than zero confidence the Republicans will ever be capable of pissing and hitting the ground so I fully expect them to nominate a Jeb Bush…or Lindsey Graham…or John McCain…oops…he’s already had his time to suck.

AWD invites everyone reading this to list what they would prefer to do rather than vote for Jeb Bush.  I know the list will be long.  But everything we list as things we’d rather do than vote for Jeb Bush will be the same things wussypants RINOs would do before nominating a conservative.

The Republicans say a third party will only guarantee Democrat control of Washington.  But RINOs running the Republican Party are doing a pretty damn good job of keeping DC in Democrat hands themselves!

America thirsts for statesmen and all we have are sorry politicians.  Conservative Republicans seek a strong conservative but all we are force fed are wussypants RINOs!

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  1. romney, bush, mccain – same sh*t, different pile!
    And you are right, they will nominate bush.

    BTW – I don’t think you should talk about “blowing the shit out of everything”, even in jest!

  2. I’d rather have a cigar with Bloomberg.

  3. I would rather take a cheese grater to my sack.

  4. wildriver says:

    Sadly, I voted for G.W. once.


    We agree with it on numerous levels and are most in agreement with the idea that a kind Nazi fascism is overtaking the US. It began long ago but was immeasurably increased under the reign of George W. Bush whose family was enmeshed in Nazi funding until public rage forced the US government to strip the family of German investment assets in 1942.

    Bush’s efforts, nakedly pursued but rarely reported, included the leveraging of a police state, the creation of “Homeland Security” with its overtones of the Nazi Fatherland and the repositioning of the US’s various intelligence and policing agencies as the sword of the state to be turned aggressively against the American people.”…

  5. i’ rather remarry the ex wife who spent me into bankrupsy than vote for another bush.

  6. The democrats will switch sides and vote for bush in the primary’s and the media will push him as THE man to vote for and the republicans will go down in defeat again, we must stop this piece of shit before he’s dumped on us. 3rd party time in my opinion.

    • aceydoozy says:

      I know what is said about a third party and the havoc it would create, but it’s high time to give it a try, maybe it would put the final nail in the coffin of this pathetic GOP.

    • Exactly – just as they did with McPain. Big media wanted McPain instead of GWB in the 2000 primary – easier for the Demos to beat. Remember liberal Repub “frontrunner” Rudy Giuliani ? He was a can’t miss for the 2008 nomination. Fifty million bucks spent and he got one delegate before dropping out. Notice too how the Repub establishment derailed Steve Forbes, who had great ideas in ’96 and 2000… Media will promote a sure Repub loser Ever see a Democrat who supports term limits ?

  7. Mr. Grumpus says:

    I would rather floss my toenails or look at Piglosi’s boobs than vote for any more RINOs. They’ve gotten the very last vote they will ever get from the Grumpy family.

  8. I would rather do a 3some with “Chaz”Napolitano and Hillary than vote for this guy !

  9. Spurwing Plover says:

    I would rather be marooned on some planet then vote for that reptile

  10. not2latenow says:

    I’d rather spend the night at Motel 6 with Janet Reno than vote for another Bush.

    • That did it! I think I would have to vote Jeb rather than the Reno and Motel 6 deal. Just imagine, bed bugs, filthy, smelly, ugly, etc. On top of that, dealing with a room at a Motel 6. I do have some standards.

  11. bluffcreek1967 says:

    Jeb is about as firmly conservative as a wet noodle. The man looks wimpish, soft and about as politically intimidating as old Mittens from the last disastrous election. He has no solid ideas. He has no fire in his belly, so to speak. The U.S. is imploding financially and morally and all he can do about it is criticize conservatives and Tea Party types for being ‘extreme.’ I utterly despise this RINO and his family. If by some miracle any member of the Bush family happens to read this, do the American people a huge favor and LEAVE US ALONE! Don’t go away mad . . . just go away.

  12. Dude, if Jeb Bush is the GOP nominee, we’ll go hog hunting on election day.

    • careful with those “hog hunting” comments, Michael. following so many references to Reno, et al. people might misconstrue your intent. ha

  13. I’d rather be forced to attend a live reenactment of the campfire scene from Blazing Saddles – without a gasmask – than vote for Jeb.

    And I agree: It’s 3rd Party Time!


    I would rather be aboard the TITTANIC or HINDINBURG just before their accedent I would rather walk through a minefield I would rather watch a JAMES CAMERON movie

  15. Simp Jack says:

    I rather have a threesome with Kagan, Napolitano, and Hillary….IN THE NUDE!!

    • bluffcreek1967 says:

      Wait a minute! Now you’ve gone too far. Have you no shame, no decency, no sense of self-pride? Can you imagine the indecency of having to be wedged in between all that wrinkly skin, the cellulite, the girth and massive blubber? That’s more than any human could possibly endure! I urge you to reconsider sir.

      • Simp Jack says:

        Yes, yes, I lost my mind temporarily. AWD got me all fired up I lost blood flow to the stem cell for a bit. Now I’m suffering from PSTD from the mental images I have created, Oh the horror….

  16. Jeb is too much like his pop George Bush I, the 1988 one hit wonder. Voters then figured he would be like Ronald Reagan – not at all the case. A reporter a few months back (and I can’t find the exact quotes) asked Pop Bush about Obummer and Pop, GB the first said O was trying to do a good job, seemed like a nice young man, etc. He also said he and Bubba Bill Clinton had become good friends and talked often. Pathetic – no wonder George was a one-termer. He always thought liberals were his friends even as they inserted the knife in his back. Dan Quayle, actually a sharp politician with some savvy, told George to say hell no to the Demo tax increase deal in 1990 or he would instantly ruin his political career. Dan was right and George still hasn’t figured out who his friends are. I doubt Jeb has either.

  17. I notice a lot of commenters are becoming night owls here. I’m glad I’m not the only person crazy enough to be up this time of night. These folks are still sharp and comical, too. The world needs more humor. You’ll notice liberals have no sense of humor. Of course many look funny.

  18. You are way too kind in describing the Bushes as “wussypants moderate RINOs”.

  19. Czar of Defenestration says:

    Same goes for ME…including not voting for Christie (another early pre-promotion “he’s inevitable!” contender). WE NEED A NEW PARTY – *NOW*!!!

    • look, the solution is simple: we elect the leader of a large criminal gang as president. excellent credentials— corrupt, ruthless, knows how to defend his turf, knows how to handle fiscal matters, knows how to keep order and discipline, huge ego undeterred by others opinions; i could go on, but you get the picture.

  20. eekalouse says:

    I would rather:
    Pass a kidney stone
    Watch Michael Moore and Moore in a gay porn video
    Eat Arugala
    Walk with Code Pink Stink
    Ballet with Rahm
    Bathhouse with Barry
    Munch with Mooch
    ….. you get the idea.

  21. asparaguswhiz says:

    I’d rather reenact scenes from Brokeback Mountain with Harry Reid.

  22. I rather get…….

    a swift kick in the nuts than vote for JEB BUSH…….

  23. I’d rub a culture of Hugo Chavez’ ass cancer into an open wound before voting for Jeb.

  24. Fu#kObama says:

    I would rather shower in the Penn State locker room than vote for another Bush.

    Jeb would just guarantee the next president is Hillarity…. But she ain’t no joke.

  25. I am having conniption fits over this love affair I am seeing on Fox News for Jeb “the fake conservative” Bush……..

    I would rather sh!t my pants and not change my underwear for a month before I would vote for Jeb Bush………

  26. I’d rather take a job as the butt crack cleaner for Moochelle Obama, and that’s a BIG job!

  27. I would rather eat vegetable lasagna off of Michael Moore’s naked body than vote for Jeb Bush.

    Here’s my prediction: The GOP establishment forces Jeb Bush down our throats. Right from the start he isn’t getting much support so he pivots and starts talking like a conservative. Then he loses and the establishment blames it on conservatives.

  28. Blistered says:

    I would rather brush my teeth with a skunk butt on a stick and French kiss Rachel Maddow while doing the hustle than vote for another Bush!

    Blistered, out!

    • don’t get it. after brushing with a smelly skunk butt, why would you want to foul your mouth by french kissing Maddow????(ps-she’s a he)

  29. Winston Smithereens says:

    I’d rather see Barbara Bush naked than vote for Jeb.


    I would rather eat GRAPE FRUIT i would rather be a vulture circling over some guy crawling along looking for water

  31. No one has to worry about Jeb Bush becoming president. Running maybe, but winning no.
    If the Republicans want to give away another election all they have to do is have Bush run for president…why can’t they get it?!!!

  32. Max & Eric says:

    I have this arguement with my best pal all the time. He always says Third party, I come back and say Third Party will never get elected A vote for a third Party is a vote for enslavement….I know A third party is a sweet Idea. ..I honestly feel we`re Screwed no matter what.

    As Far as another Bush… I would rather take a cutting torch to my Colts. I would rather drive a chevy truck (Barf) I would rather wear skinny jeans Until I got arrested. Trust me thats scary and funny.

  33. OldmanRick says:

    Rather than state what I would do, I will state what I will do and that is do my darndest to see any one other than Jeb Bush as the repugnut contender in 2016. He is nothing more than a progressive liberal jackass posing as a repugnut.