Ten members of Congress with nothing better to do have sent a letter to the NFL and Washington Redskin’s owner Dan Snyder demanding the team change its name because Redskins is offensive to redskins Indians Native Americans. It’s just so hard to keep us with what offends every minority group these days!

Here’s the discussion on the PC ESPN network:

The letter to Redskin owner Dan Snyder says that “Native Americans throughout the country consider the ‘R-word’ a racial, derogatory slur akin to the ‘N-word’ among African Americans or the ‘W-word’ among Latinos.” N word? Check! W word? Wussypants? I thought that only applied to congressional Republicans!

In the United States of the Offended, we must do everything possible to avoid offending the ever-offended minorities here and around the world. Since AWD lives in Dallas, I call on the NFL to ban entirely the racist, offensive Washington Redskins and ban them sumbitches forever from playing (or coming close) to playing football! Racist bastids! Enough is enough!

But if we are going to start changing names of football teams to protect the tender sensibilities of minorities, it’s time the homophobic San Francisco 49’ers are forced to change their homophobic name! For decades, the 49’ers have insulted the Lebanese, Bi-Sexual, Tri-Sexual, Tran-gendered, Trans-Am community in San Francisco! The hatred must stop!

Homo-sexules commonly utilize a sexule practice called “the 69.” It is a practice where each member of the homo-sexule partner puts their tingly parts in the face of the other homo-sexule partner. However, there are numerous members of San Francisco’s homo-sexule community who suffer from poor eyesight and are incapable of lining up said “tingly parts” of their anatomy with the face of their homo-sexule partner. Although they attempt to complete the “69” procedure, their poor eyesight restricts them to only achieving “the 49.” Hence, the hateful, homophobic name of the San Francisco NFL professional football team, the San Francisco 49’ers.

Bruce Koskolowski of the People For A Gay America said in a press release:

“It’s time the homo-sexule community of San Francisco come together. As if we haven’t already! Chuckle chuckle. But we can no longer tolerate the hatred and insensitivity towards the members of our homo-sexule community with poor eyesight. And we call on the NFL to force the 49’ers to change the name of their San Francisco franchise to a name that doesn’t ridicule our poorly-sighted brothers.”

Hugh G. Rection, President of the Gay, Poorly-Sighted 49’er Fan Club added:

“While we appreciate a game that has a position like Tight End and has Ball Boys, we are deeply offended by the obvious slight at us poorly-sighted homo-sexules by the team name 49’ers! While we poorly-sighted homo-sexules often attempt to see one up close in a perfectly executed 69, our physical disability prohibits us from reaching the full Monty. Let me tell you, as a poorly sighted homo-sexule, I’ve kissed more knee-caps than I care to remember! And I don’t appreciate the obvious ridicule from the 49’ers!

We immediately call on the NFL and the San Francisco 49’ers to change the name of their team to something more inclusive of the San Francisco gay community. Something like the San Francisco Quiche-Eaters or San Francisco Pillow Biters would be much more in harmony with sexual makeup of the Bay Area.”

AWD agrees with Mr Hugh G Rection and calls on all offensive sports teams to immediately change their names. In America, we cannot run the risk of offending anyone. Except white males. They don’t count. Because they’re racist! Therefore, I call on the Atlanta Braves, the Cleveland Indians, and the Chicago Blackhawks of the NHL to immediately change their names to the Atlanta Crackas, the Cleveland Inbred Trailer Trash, and the Chicago Redneck Racists!

The hatred has to stop!

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  1. Green Bay Packers and Tennessee Titans can keep their names but I say send the IRS after the Patriots.

    • bigtimer says:


      Good one! 😉

    • The IRS had better leave my beloved Patriots alone or there will be hell to pay. That is something I cannot tolerate and I will take action.

      Die Hard Patriots Fan!!!

      I suspect the leading Dude is worried about the Cowboys and that is why he wants the RACIST Redskins (there I said it!!, I’m a racist) out of the Eastern Division.

      Just kidding AWD!!

  2. MichaelT says:

    San Francisco ’69rs, I thought you of all people would beat me to it.

  3. MichaelT says:

    There is a short list of things I could care less about like recycling, tree hugging, tofu, hippies and patchouly oil. The NFL is also on that list.

    • Snake Oiler says:

      You got that right, man! However, it might be fun to bestow some more fitting names on some of the franchises that better correspond to reality. Bears wouldn’t cut it for Chicago – Gangsters (or better still, Gangstas) would fill the bill. Saints? More like Waterfront Thugs. Green Bay and San Francisco could swap franchises, then they could call themselves the Fudge Packers.

  4. Guess the Kansas City Chiefs will be targeted next… the Chiefs could always change the team name to the Kansas City Swallows… after all, bird names are always popular… just ask the Baltimore Orioles.

    • bigtimer says:

      Hey there…don’t be bringing up our west coast Seahawks, or Chickenhawks as my hubby calls them now and then depending on how they play.

      Then there’s always my San Diego Chargers…what would we call them?

  5. BT Chargers are going to the Superbowl this year!

  6. BT if you still need a name San Diego Chokers has worked in the past.

  7. Guillermo Del Toro says:

    Alternate NFL names
    Washington Foreskins
    Tampa Bay Buckingqueers
    Kansas City Queefs
    Dallas CowPies
    San Diego Discharges
    Oakland Gaydars
    Minnesota Dragqueens

  8. bigtimer says:

    Magnum and GDT…

    Good ones! You’ve both got me chucklin’ to myself. ~



    Next on their list will be terams named for predators like eagles falcons seahawks,lions,bengals and bears becuase the names offends little pansies 70s peaceninks

  11. I find the Minnesota Vikings offensive to the viking community-and the Boston Celtics-does anybody here know who the Celts were?And don’t get me started on Notre Dame’s “Fighting Irish” How have they gotten away with that ethnic slur for so long????

    • MichaelT says:

      How about ‘paddy wagon’ that offends me.

    • Nostradumbass says:

      And how about the Indiana “Hoosiers”?

      Hoosier: In other parts of the country, the word has been adapted to other uses. In St. Louis, Missouri, the word is used in a derogatory fashion similar to “hick” or “white trash”.[2] “Hoosier” also refers to the cotton-stowers, both black and white, who move cotton bales from docks to the holds of ships, forcing the bales in tightly by means of jackscrews. A low-status job, it nevertheless is referred to in various sea shanty lyrics. Shanties from the Seven Seas[3] includes lyrics that mention hoosiers. Hoosier at times can also be used as a verb meaning to trick or swindle someone.

  12. Dave in Texas says:



    I guess theyll get them to do like they did at U.C. SANTA CRUZ and name themselves for a stupid yellow molusk and STANFORD who although their named for a bird(Cardinals)their mascots this stupid looking tree

    • Nostradumbass says:

      Or go completely into the plant/vegetable genre with Ohio State Buckeyes.


      [ búk i ]

      1.fruit or poisonous seed: a prickly or smooth fruit of a tree or bush of the horse chestnut family, or the large shiny brown poisonous seed it contains
      2.poisonous horse-chestnut tree: the tree or bush that produces buckeyes.

      The name brings fear to many children, so they probably should rename the team instead be called the “Peanuts” at least it sounds similar to Ohio State’s favorite “snack food”.

  14. Guillermo Del Toro says:

    How about Mclaughlin High School in S.D.

    The Fighting Midgets


    Ten congressional busiebodies with nothing better to do then to stick their big fat noses into everything and anything

  16. WE stole this country fair and square from them Injins ! Remember the Washington Bullets ? gave Washington a bad name so they changed it to the Wizzards.There are no Wizzards in Washington.Marion Barry famously said ” DC has a low crime rate if you don’t count the murders,we cant do nothin about the murders ! “

  17. airandee says:

    I am sorry to say I have to agree that over the last several decades that the name Washington Redskins has become very offensive. I am offended by the name as it produces a very very negative image in my mind when I hear it. Therefore I suggest we change it to Potomac Redskins or Landover Redskins.

  18. Snake Oiler says:

    At first, the team’s T-shirts used “Fightin’ Whites” as the name of the team, but various media reports referred to the team as the “Whities” instead of “Whites”. The plan to insult whites in the same way the minority students perceived Native Americans being insulted backfired on the group when the team’s popularity skyrocketed. In response to customer demand, the team eventually began selling shirts under both names. The team added the phrase “Fighting the use of Native American stereotypes” to its merchandise to discourage the shirts from being worn by white supremacists, and arranged for CafePress.com to handle manufacturing and sales of the clothing.


    All White Fightin’ Whities

  19. Ronnie May says:

    Jokingly, I’ve always regarded the 49ers as the 69ers and the Redskins as the Sh*tskins.
    This nation is turning into a bunch of sissies.
    In H.S. we used to throw slang at each other and other H.S. players did the same. It was all done in a joking way, not a fighting way. We had good times back then. Now kids want to shoot each other over girls or the neighborhood they live in.
    This is so immature it makes these people look like morons. Get a life!!! You should be teaching young people how to grow up strong not growing weak. This crap makes me sick.

  20. Nostradumbass says:

    The Detroit Leeches vs. Chicago Urban Yoots

    Watch as the hoodies mug the parasites only to be slowly bled dry by the blood suckers.


    Our local High Schools teams are THE LIONS which isa PREDATOR our Jr Collage are THE EAGLES and its also a PREDATOR i hope those congressional long snoots dont ever call for a name change

  22. MC Screwdriver says:

    The Pittsburgh Steelers name reflects a dirty, polluting industry. Where do we go with that one.. Recyclers? Carbon Footprints?


    The BALTIMORE OREOLES and the ST LOUIS CARDINALS show the more fimiliar Male Bird will feminuts get upset?