Ted Nugent, the Motor City Madman, is considering a run for POTUS in 2016. Oh, come on…say the wussypants Republicans! You can’t be serious! A Gibson Byrdland-slinging rock star as the leader of the free world? You’re damn straight, AWD says! Wanna fight about it? Didn’t think so!
Ted Nugent, who has never held public office, might be just the guy to put America back on track! After a succession of wussypants RINOs, horndog socialist Democrats and a communist community organizer, Uncle Ted might be the guy to put a stranglehold on the downward slide America has been on over the past few decades! As Kinky Friedman’s campaign slogan said during his run for the Texas governorship, “why the hell not?” Why the hell not, indeed!
Conservatives are ready for something completely different! We’ve been served up the same steaming pile of wussypants RIN sh*t in elections since Ronbo Reagan left the stage and we’re ready for someone who walks tall, shoots straight, and can flat make a guitar talk! Also, wouldn’t it be refreshing to have a contender for the White House actually believe in American traditions and the Constitution for once? Hell, AWD is ready to get behind the Uncle Ted for President wagon!
Who will the GOP wussyboy elites push on us in 2016? The usual squat-to-pee girly men like Jeb Bush and Chrispy Chreme Christy. Yaaaaawwwnnn! I’d rather field strip one of my ARs in the dark than spend the gas in my beloved F150 to drive a block to vote for those RINO-turds! Won’t do it! And AWD will never, EVER vote for another @#&* Bush. And I’d rather sell my children off to Zimbabwean medical experiments than ever considering to vote for that round mound of libtarded sound up in Nueva Jersey!
One thing I’ll give Ted is he has guts to walk it like he talks it! And right now, guts is enough! He’s an unflinching gun owner and wouldn’t take guff from the Chinese or Russkie bastids! Wouldn’t it be fun for a change to have the rest of the world scared sh*tless about what the POTUS might do if they cross us? Right now, the thugs of the world know that all they’ll get from Hussein is a bow! Screw that!
Another reason I like Ted is because he is a bow hunter. AWD has never met a bow hunter he didn’t like or trust! That might sound petty but after Obama, I’ll take any bow hunter! They actually like and believe in America! Again, right now that’s good enough!
America has gone down the road of wussypants Republicans and socialist Dims! We need a real American who espouses conservative ideals! We need an American who isn’t afraid to head butt that Englishter bastid Piers Morgan and his worthless ilk in the propaganda media. We need a President that loves America and will start to unscrew the ginormous mess we find ourselves in.
I don’t trust politicians! I’m ready for something new. New blood with guts! Never again do I want to hear a Republican say “my good friends on the other side of the aisle.” Unless he says “I’m going to bodyslam my good friends on the other side of the aisle…then go after their families!” I believe Ted Nugent would be that guy! I sure can’t see that waste of oxygen Jeb Bush bodyslamming anyone! He might break a fingernail.
Screw it! AWD is tired of the same old, same old! I want something new. I want somebody who won’t take guff off the Chinese! Somebody who will put Putin in an inverted suplex followed by an unsanctioned piledriver outside the squared circle on the concrete! Then play the National Anthem at ear-bleeding volume levels that will melt the faces of liberals! Ted Nugent for Pres!
Disclaimer: AWD has always been a big Nuge fan. In my band in high school, AWD did the vocals on Snakeskin Cowboys. Sounded better than Uncle Ted hisself! It’s a gift.
For Music That Doesn’t Suck, here’s some of my favorite Ted songs:
One word. Goodern’ hell! Ted Nugent for President! Why the hell not?