Everybody knows liberals are the worst dressers in history. Not that it matters much because liberals are pretty much ugly all day so nice clothing on a libtard is a lot like polishing poop. But there was a time when libtards could be spotted wearing their standard issue of worn out, smelly tie-died t shirts, ripped up jeans and sandals. Or maybe they’d break out that Che Guevara t shirt when they had a protest to attend and wanted to make a good impression. Those days are long gone!

Lebanese womerns are worse (if that’s possible) because they always look like bufforillas complete with those ‘women’s basketball coach’ dykie hairdos and flannel shirts. The only dude who would be interested in some flippy-floppy with those hags would be Bubba Clintoon. I mean, after all….Hillary. Hillary pretty much proves Bubba will do anything.

But tie-dyes and Che t shirts are Armani compared to what libtarded males are wearing these days! Hell, the modern libwear coming out these days would get laughs even in Nueva Jork and San FagCisco! Liberals are donning themselves some gay apparel with greater frequency these days. Here’s three “outfits” no one with a man thing should ever be caught dead in. Wear this sh*t where AWD saddles up to the bar and being dead is a purt’ near a certainty! So here’s three steps that will make you dress like a ‘tard and/or end up pig food out in Cooper, Texas

liberal fashion

Great googly moogly! That is what libs are calling male fashion these days! I crap you negative! And we thought metrosexuals were bad! A new low, even for libtards! I wonder if those dudes have any rooms for tampons in those dresses?

This sh*t shows the real goal of libtards. They want to turn men into women. They have greatly succeeded because what real man would ever be a lib in the first place? Think Ronbo Reagan ever ‘got in touch with his feminine side?’ Hell no! He was kicking the sh*t out of Russkies! Think the Duke ever moisturized? Yeah, right. Think Chuck Norris ever soaked away his troubles in a lavender scented bubble bath? Shee-ut! He was too busy delivering round house kicks to the melon of some bug-humping Viet Cong bastid!

Look at some of the libtarded tools on MSNBC to learn how not to dress unless you want to see a big, angry man-thing in close proximity! I mean, really. Does anyone really want to look like this pathetic poofter?

chris hayes

More like bend over and say “ahhhh.” What a pathetic, girly-man tool!

And who can forget the homo fashion stylings of Yoko Ono? I hear this line was very popular with the DNC.

yoko ono fashion

You have to give John Lennon credit for one thing. He had guts to sleep with Yoko Ono! After all, they produced Julian. Maybe he was drunk. Real drunk!

It’s not that hard to dress like a man. Clothes, as they say, make the man. That’s why AWD’s preferred winter wear is a pair of jeans, an AWD t shirt and cowboy boots. When it’s summer and the Texas sun beats down at temps over 100 degrees, AWD will be found in jeans, an AWD t shirt and cowboy boots. This ensem has been proven to be comfortable, perfect for concealing several handguns, and guaran-damn-teed to reel in the biscuit from the little fillies.

Now, AWD realizes our brethren trapped behind enemy lines in blue state gulags might want to rethink the jeans and cowboy boots thing lest they be mistaken for one of the @#&* Village People!

Conservative men are the only men left in America! And it’s our duty to teach our sons how to dress, act, and shoot like a man. Neglect these important lessons and your son might just end up counting thread counts on pillows up in Greenwich Village and being a libtard. But I repeat myself.

Here’s the great American Merle Haggard singing about manly behavior…and footwear.

Listen to Merle..and AWD. We’ll shoot you straight on how to be a man!

Hell, I almost forgot! The genius behind the Dude-O-Caster, Greg Savage wrote to tell me that none other than the great Donnie Iris had laid his eyes on the DOC and had high praise! Donnie Freaking Iris! He’s the man behind one of the greatest of rock songs evah! Why, Donnie was selected as AWD’s Music That Doesn’t Suck back in May of 2012. I love his song “Ah, Leah” so much I would bear it’s children if I had female tingly parts! Leah is one of AWD’s favorite names for fillies. Don’t know why, it just is. Couple that with a bad ass song, a hot video and, dayum!

Donnie, you can look at the Dude-O-Caster but can’t touch! I don’t care how damn good of a guitar picker you are. Well, maybe if you give me the number to Leah! Maybe I should send Donnie an AWD t shirt! And y’all, the DOC just screams!

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  1. Since when does dressing like a Turkish peg boy rate runway time in the vaunted halls of Fashion?
    Do people actually get paid do make that?
    Lars grab your crayons ’cause we’re now in the fashion bid’ness!

  2. Spurwing Plover says:

    Run around in pink ride a girliemans bicycle eat a total vegan diet and play MUSKRAT LOVE,DOG & BUTTERFLY and BIG YELLOW TAXI on a tuba all day long say your favorite movies are PEE WEES BIG ADVENTURE,THE OOGIELOVES BIG BALLOON ADVENTURE

  3. cranky.white.woman says:

    Julian Lennon is a product of John’s relationship with Cynthia Twist, his first wife. Sean Lennon was created with Local Yokel — er, Yoko Ono.

  4. Well the best advice I can give is, if you have a son take him hunting so he ends up being a real man instead of a pussy. Make sure you have a damn good huntin’ dog too!

    Well Trained Hunting Dog:

    This man wanted to buy a hunting dog. He heard of this guy who had a dog for sale, so he went to check it out. They get the dog out to the woods and the owner snaps his fingers and says “GO!” The dog takes off, comes back a few minutes later, and barks once. The man asked the owner “What does that mean?”

    The owner says “Well, he barked once, that means he saw one rabbit.” The guy says “OK, let’s see it again.”

    The owner snaps his fingers and says “GO!” The dog takes off, comes back a few minutes later, and barks twice. The guy asks “OK, what does that mean?”

    The owner says “Well, he barked twice, that means he saw two rabbits.”

    The guy says “OK, one more time and he’s sold.” The owner snaps his fingers, the dog takes off, comes back carrying a stick and starts to hump his owners leg.

    The guy says “WHAT! does that mean?”

    The owner says “Well, that means he just saw more f*ckin’ rabbits than you can shake a stick at!”

  5. Pingback: Larwyn’s Linx: Obama solicits ideas for ways to evade Constitution | Preppers Universe

  6. Obammy has got some fashion for us all coming soon………………………………………..

    how long until they come for AWD type sites???

  7. WTF AWD – that’s a roman tunic and because it is being worn short sleeved without a belt and a toga (aristocracy), or a cape (Military), signifies it as roman slaves garb… Perfect for liberal democrat voters.

    I say a man should appropriately dress for his surroundings. I can go from board-shorts, tank, and sandals to a three piece wool summer weight suit, and back to business causal, or jeans and ropers. It’s about blending in, yet having the details to stand out.

    If I were in the Scottish hinterlands this might be appropriate

    Then again many gay Leprechauns may find this to be a comfortable ensemble, note the sexy buckles on the shoes.

    People wearing fashion as ‘shock art’ are just silly attention whores

  8. awd you never let us down….”blue state gulags”…that’s great…..I would never have thought that one up…..really effing good…………hope you don’t mind if I use that one………..

    this little bastard got to me…..I wanted to punch this little left-wing bastard’s lights out……………

    and this piece-of-sh!t too……………………………………………..

  9. AWD I know you like KISS. Paul Stanley takes his son shooting, sounds like he knows how to raise a man.


  11. this just in……breaking news………

    Sandra Fluke’s vagina attacks reporters…….Sandra Fluke’s vagina has attacked several reporters…..after hearing about the recent remarks by Mike Huckabee Sandra Fluke’s vagina went out into the streets looking for those reporting on the story and viciously attacked them snapping incessantly…….the reporters are said to be scared to death at the sight of Sandra Fluke’s vagina and fear antother attack is imminent……..

    anyone reporting on the Mike Huckabee comments is fair game according to the out of control vagina……the vicious vagina is said to have the answer to the ailing economy and will visit the white house where Bill Clinton is said he will make sure that he is there to control the overly excited vagina……..

    Mooch Obongo is said to be very jealous of Sandra’s vagina and will not let her husband meet with the out of control vagina……

  12. Straight, functional with classic lines, suitable for work or play. Easily accessorized and right for all occasions. Oh, those are men? Nevermind.

  13. Miles, They’re just Differently Attired.

  14. Liberal, Homo, and Pervert are synonyms.

  15. They’re pushing for androgyny. In Liberal La-la Land, there’s no gender (only difference is in the “equipment”) no race (it’s just skin color), we’re all the same.

    Except when it comes to affirmative action and so-called “hate crimes.”

  16. Lt. Greyman, NVA says:

    So the three easy steps are…?

    I always hate it when an article says “Three easy steps” and then never actually says the steps.