A 13 year old white teen was recently chased and set on fire by two 16 year old black yoots in Kansas City. The black teens told the white boy he was “getting what he deserved.” This story has caused great alarm across America! How could those black teens do something so horrible in the year 2012? This is just the latest example of young blacks who have not been raised properly wreaking havoc in their communities! My heavens! Pouring gasoline on someone and then setting them on fire? Don’t they know that gasoline now costs $3.59 per gallon? And did they even think what damage gasoline can do to the environment?
Sierra Club spokesperson Hugh G. Rection said concerning the incident:
“We in the Sierra Club are appalled by this brutal and savage tragedy! Yes, yes, we understand the white kid probably got a little burned but the real victim here is Mother Earth! Unfortunately, not all the gasoline was burned on the white boy. Some of it, unfortunately, dripped off him and onto the ground before it could ignite. Mother Earth is weeping and we weep for her!
In the future, if the young African-Americans want to torture a white kid, they should consider using alternative, green methods. Perhaps tying him to a windmill or making him ride in a Chevy Volt (it will burn up eventually). But if the African-American youth insist on gasoline, the Sierra Club recommends an ethanol blend that is environmentally friendly to Mother Earth. This incident has been a tragedy and we hope for a speedy recovery for the environment.”
One of the accused black teen’s grandmother, Shameka Jackson said:
“My grandson is a goot boy! I know he would never do what they say he did. Maybe that cracka said something racist.”
Here’s the news report:
The EPA has been notified about the gasoline spill. EPA environmental expert Bruce Koskoloski made a statement:
“The EPA has called for a multi-departamental study of the affected area. We have called for the Departments of Energy, Agriculture and Housing and Urban Development to perform a comprehensive examination of Kansas City. As such, it is under the EPA authority that I hereby close down Kansas City and order all citizens to vacate the city limits until the report has concluded, which we estimate will require approximately five years.”
While some parents in the area have called for the offenders to be prosecuted under Hate Crime legislation, the Federal Department of Justice is not sure that will be necessary.
Attorney General Eric Holder said when reached:
“Hate Crime legislation? I’m not sure that will be necessary. After all, the guy dripping the gas on the ground from all over his body was white. But I can guarantee that we will prosecute him to the fullest extent of the law for environmental damage done to the local ecosphere.”
When asked about the possibility of racial unrest due to the severity of this attack and his possible action to bring peace to the area, MSNBC anchor and noted tax cheat Al Sharpton said:
“Protest we much and much we will be about this! If the young brothers wanted to bust up a cracka, why didn’t they just use bats or fists? Why waste all that gasoline? That could have gone in my Escalade! These young people don’t know nothing about bustin’ up crackas these days!”
Community organizers are calling for the family of the white teen to apologize for bringing all this negative attention to Kansas City and for having the EPA shut down the city for five years. The parents of the boy have so far refused to apologize, thus angering the local community organizer community.
Local organizer Shabooh Shabaah X said:
“It is the attitude of the parents of the white boy that has kept Kansas City from progressing along the lines of cities like Detroit and Chicago! They must apologize for the irreparable harm their child has done to Kansas City and for all of the years of white privilege they have enjoyed because their white ancestors committed genocide against the world.”
So far the NY Times, Washington Post, NBC, CBS, ABC and CNN have denied any knowledge of the incident.