Hollywood actor Matthew McConaughey announced yesterday that he has saved the placenta from his child’s birth and will bury it in an orchard. The announcement was made after a long session of banging gongs and barking at the moon. He said, “It’s going to be in the orchards and it’s going to bear some wonderful fruit.” Remember, this is the same guy who was arrested a few years ago for banging bongos nude after smoking copious amounts of marijuana. It seems as though he must have smoked half of Jamaica before making this announcement.

Question: is it a pre-requisite to be a Hollywood actor that one must be batsh*t crazy? Somehow I cannot imagine the Duke or even Chuck Norris burying placentas to beautify the planet. I can imagine Chuck strangling some terroristss with a placenta if that was the only weapon to be found. The Angry White Dude humbly suggests that McConaughey not bury the placenta but bury his head instead. What a tool!

Here’s the mug shot and information from his nude bongo session:

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/mugshots/mcconaugheymug1.html