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ILLEGAL NIGERIAN SECURITY GUARD: DOING WORK DEAD AMERICAN WHOSE IDENTITY HE STOLE CAN’T DO

ILLEGAL NIGERIAN SECURITY GUARD: DOING WORK DEAD AMERICAN WHOSE IDENTITY HE STOLE CAN’T DO

A Nigerian illegal alien stole the identity of a dead American guy and has now worked in America for 20 years. No, not Barack Hussein Obama, you racist, inbred, right-wing extremist rednecks! It’s some Newark Airport security manager named Bimbo. I crap you negative. His name is Bimbo. Maybe he’s named after his mother. Bimbo [...]

ANGRY WHITE DUDE WILL NOT CONDUCT VIRGINITY TESTS ON READERS

The Big Sexy had every damn intention of sitting back in the Captain’s Chair and whipping up a chart-topping angry white post tonight. Every damn intention! But after a long day of some heavy duty creative loafing down in the mines and being held down by the man, my intellectual laziness (and every other kind, [...]

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Since Hussein Hopenchange has come out of the closet on gay marriage, AWD is playing the gayest video ever recorded in human history. This is an oldie but gay-ie! It’s Mick Jagger and David Bowie totally destroying Dancing In The Street. It’s pretty common knowledge that Jagger and Bowie have sung into the microphone on [...]

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CAPTION THIS, OPEN POST AND MUSIC THAT DOESN’T SUCK

OK goat ropers. Time to embrace diversity around these parts. You know AWD loves him some diversity! And to prove AWD’s love of diversity, here’s a photo of the actual coaster AWD has on his desk. Yes, those are vomit stains. But isn’t that just the perfect coaster for a diversity-lovin’ sumbitch like the Big [...]

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AWD: “Y’all, I’m so tired of writing about politics I could just spit on something!”

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HAPPY EARTH DAY, RIGHT-WING EXTREMISTS!

Oh, how AWD loves him some Earth Day! I have no problem with Earth…it’s all right. Never really thought about living anywhere else. After all, as scientist Elton John discovered, “Mars ain’t the kind of place to raise your kids, in fact it’s cold as hell.” After performing my personal research, AWD would concur with [...]

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AWD IPAD OR NO AWD IPAD? THAT IS THE OPEN POST QUESTION

AWD has watched iPads now for a couple of years. I can’t decide if I would really like it and use it or if I’d end up frisby-ing that sumbitch into the closet. But the new one coming out is supposed to be all that and more, so AWD has just about talked himself into [...]

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