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HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY FROM ANGRY WHITE DUDE!

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AWD wishes a very happy Mother’s Day to all the wonderful mothers! I hope everyone has a very happy, peaceful day and all the great mothers are treated as the queens they are. And not the Caitlyn Jenner kind of queens.

AWD will not be able to be with his beautiful mother, Angry White Dudette today. She broke her parole again and is back in the hoosegow. And since she started a riot because she wasn’t pleased with her latest jailhouse tattoo, she’s now in solitary and cannot have visitors. But I love her and will be thinking of her today. Because she’s the best mama in the world! And I love her more than anything!

AWD will be with the filly later today. We’ll be both missing our mothers. I’m giving the little filly a special treat for Mother’s Day. Today, I will let her prepare a huge dinner for me. Afterwards, I will allow her to further serve me by cleaning the kitchen. She’ll finish off the day by putting a new roof on the house. Why does AWD do this on Mother’s Day? Because I care! Oh, and you’ll be pleased to know that the generous AWD has splurged on her gift and gotten her a Swiffer Wet Jet! With extra cleaning pads too! Oh, the joy she’ll have keeping my floors in tip-top condition! Now she won’t have to scrub them on her hands and knees. I know! I know! I splurged. But never let it be said AWD is not a romantic fool!

Y’all know I’m joking, mostly. AWD will actually spend the day grilling steaks, smoking ribs and making some of the best brussel sprouts you’ve ever eaten. She’ll clean up the kitchen, of course. It’s a beautiful day in AWD’s beloved Lone Star state and a great day to celebrate all the wonderful and loving mothers in America.

We know it’s not easy being a Mother. It’s probably the most thankless job in the world. My Mother used to tell me I’d make Jesus cuss. My grandmother used to say “you raise your own executioners.” In my case, I believe they both were right.

But through all the tough times, family is really what it’s all about. And our kids are why we’re here. I hope everyone has a great day and I want to thank all mothers for the hard work, unwavering love, and eternal patience you give to your children and grandchildren! We love y’all, mean it!

AWD

PS: Here’s a video of what a typical mom says in a 24 hour period. Funny!

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