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MY GUITAR WANTS TO KILL YOUR PREACHER! – OPEN POST!

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JUSTIN BIEBER...BLESS HIS HEART

In North Texas, a mega-church preacher was beaten to death with a guitar by an attacker who ran his car through the church wall. The preacher was rumored to have been playing the Amazing Grace version by Justin Bieber on his six string just before the attack. God has forgiven the killer.

Now AWD admits, there’s nothing like bad guitar picking to put me in the mood to drive my F-150 through a wall and bash somebody upside the melon with my bad-ass Stratocaster! Hell, even the god-awful, bad music those young little bastids listen to these days makes me want to wrap my acoustic around somebody’s noggin! But AWD is a civilized cat who finds beauty in everything. Even sh*tty crap that young’uns listen to today.

Here’s what I’m talking about. Listen to this from the young lady Bieber:

I hope Steely Dan is chasing the dragon with the water turning to cherry wine so they don’t ever hear that garbage! All I can say is Bieber better stay out of swinging range of my Stratocaster-o-death!

Now, compare the above garbage to this art:

“Learn to work the saxophone, I play just what I feel. Drink Scotch whiskey all night long, and die behind the wheel. They got a name for the winners in the world, I want a name when I lose. They call Alabama the Crimson Tide, call me Deacon Blues.”

I rest my case. Score one for America!

Open Post time. Drudge is saying there’s a sex scandal coming out on a big US Senator. I know I’m not a religious man and I’ve pretty much chapped the rear end of the big man upstairs a time or two, but please Lord let it be Douche Bag Harry Reid!! Or Chuck Schumer. Or Lurch Kerry….probably getting it on with some hot mares in the stable. Of course, a sex scandal is a badge of honor to a Dim.

You can post your very own prediction about the upcoming election, too. Or try to guess the poundage of NJ Governor Chris Fat Bastid RINO Christie. Or you can say snarky things about Hopenchange. Or basically, you can do what you want. You’re on your own.

For Music That Doesn’t Suck tonight, what else could it be but Frank Zappa’s “My Guitar Wants To Kill Yer Mama?” Well, this version by a few hot guitar slingers is pretty damn good. I like it better than the original. Actually, I like both. But I’ve always been a sucker for love songs. Here you go!

And for all you goat ropers with anger management problems, you might want to leave your guitar at home on Sundays!

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