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THANKS, BONO! YOU CAN GO BACK TO SINGING CRAPPY POP SONGS NOW

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RAAAAALLLLLLPH!
RAAAAALLLLLLPH!

Bono (I actually typed ‘Bobo’ but corrected it). I just don’t get it. Yeah, the singer for the vastly overrated and supremely sucky Irish band U2. Who elected this guy the supreme voice for every cause on Earth? Because, if there’s a cause, Bono is sure to show up and yack about it! He’s the Eurotrash version of Bruce Springsteen. Equally annoying but with a different fuzzy little foreigner accent!

Yesterday, Bono testified before the so-called “world’s greatest deliberative body” aka the US Senate. Here’s the deal, if Lindsey ‘Fredo’ Graham is a member of it, “deliberative” is not the correct description. “Douchebaggerous” comes to mind. Is it any wonder the approval rate of Congress is lower than snake sh*t?

What was Bono boring people in the Senate about yesterday? ISIS. If the Senate wanted to speak with someone with more cogent knowledge about the evil ISIS, they should have spoken to any number of Washington’s mentally ill homeless. Or my kid’s dog.

Here’s how the Senate wasted your tax dollars yesterday. Bono suggested:

“Don’t laugh. I think comedy should be deployed. It’s like, you speak violence, you speak their language. But you laugh at them, when they’re goose-stepping down the street, and it takes away their power. So, I’m suggesting that the Senate send in Amy Schumer, and Chris Rock, and Sacha Baron Cohen, thank you.”

Well, there you go. All those savage 7th century murderers need is a few chuckles and game over! Actually, I agree that Amy Schemer, Christ Rock and Sacha Baron Cohen should be all put on the first plane to Syria to laugh at ISIS! Please include Bruce Springsteen and Bono since their three chord snoozer songs are certainly laughable.

If comedy is the answer to savage Islam, why not send over some funny little tactical nukes into the strongholds of ISIS? They’d laugh until they die!

I guess the real reason Bono bugs the sh*t out of me is he’s really a gigantic hypocrite. His charitable foundation that raises huge sums of cash for the struggling masses (whoever they are) was found to give less than 1% to actual causes. Here’s what The Baltimore Sun reported a few years ago:

Last year, Bono’s nonprofit ONE foundation was at the center of semi-scandal when it was revealed that in 2008 the organization raised $14,993,873 in public donations — of which only $184,732 (or just over ONE percent) was distributed to charities. Where did the rest go? Well, more than $8 million went to salaries for executives and employees at ONE. In response to the fusillade of criticism following these revelations, ONE spokesman Oliver Buston explained, “We don’t provide programs on the ground. We’re an advocacy and campaigning organization.”

Bono’s great at pleading for US tax dollars to go to his cause du jour. Spending his own money? Not so much. In the naaaaame of hypocrisy!

AWD had a conversation with Big Fur Hat about how annoying this Bono cat is a few summers ago. Bono can’t say anything clearly. He tries to make everything like he’s some kind of philosopher. Or a drunk. Here he is talking about Leonard Cohen. (As any AWD reader knows, AWD is a huge Leonard fan so I was ready to shoot my tv when I watched this)

Yes, Bono. Some people make doors. Others cut hedges. Others are self-important blowhards who bore the hell out of us. And I don’t think you make doors or trim the hedges! Neither does the wasteoids in the Senate who asked you to testify.

If the Senate wants to waste their time with blowhard wastes of space, they should bring in Al Gore and ask him how many millions he made off of his Global Warming invention? And why all the damn ice bergs are a floating around the North and South poles? You know, the ice bergs and ice caps Al Gore said six years ago that wouldn’t exist in five years? Hell, AWD is still pissed at Gore because I spent a fortune on those penguin decoys to get ready for the Texas penguin hunting season which never came!

There’s enough annoying people in Congress! The Senate doesn’t need to bring in fuzzy little foreigners like Bono to tell us to comedy ISIS to death! And as for unfunny liberal comedians testifying to the Senate, isn’t Al Franken still up there?

Here’s a hilarious video of U2 guitar play “The Edge” (really? The Edge is his name?) showing Jimmy Page how to play the two chords of the U2 song “I Will Follow.” I’m sure Jimmy was thinking “I can’t believe I’m playing guitar in a beginner class with this guy!”

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29 Comments

  1. Spurwing Plover

    I wonder of old Bonehead Bono has ever read a koran and what it says about Gays and christians has he ever read anything beside a music book where he catterwalls some noise

  2. What a F*cking MORON this guy is!

    I can’t wait to see ‘Bobo’ go to an ISIS controlled area of Iraq or Syria and when he sees them all he has to do is point his finger and “laugh” at them. Then he’ll see how ‘powerful’ he and his stupid laughter is. Of course they’ll surrender immediately.

    MORON!!!

  3. Vito Corleone

    People is there any more sheer evidence that we as Americans are soon to be called to our sacred constitutional duty. Talky talky walky walky,as they said many times back in the “Nam there’s gooks in the wire” I leave it to your descretion as to who the gooks are in this metaphor.

  4. So, by laughing at them they will stop shooting at people and blowing things up?

    No one in ISIS pays attention to Western comedians like Amy Shumer or Chris Rock. They do however know how to maximize attention. They are able to exploit western media and thinking to an extent that Bono & Co. could hardly dream of doing. All of their actions garner enormous media attention.

    I was wondering when and where Bono was going to show up on the set of the refugees crisis.

  5. Quartierleblanc

    And just another example of why liberalism is a mental disorder and societal suicide. Fifty years ago this guy would have been placed in a mental institution for saying stuff like this.

  6. like, way out man……..

    like, it’s the cool thing man……it’s time for you squares to get with it….

    like, don’t you know what I’m say’n man…….get with it man……don’t be a square…..

    don’t you know the chicks dig it, man….hey man, don ‘t be hassling my mind man with all this negativity, man…….

    just say it in a poem, man……then the world can really dig what you have to say, man……….

    http://o.onionstatic.com/images/articles/article/20786/beatnik2_png_250x1000_q85.jpg

    just ask our hero, man….Maynard G. Krebs……man……..

    ya got me, man…….you dig…….just listen to our leader, man……

    http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_nu4lMTmWMvk/TMM45dpTjFI/AAAAAAAAAA0/_3NctdPEdZo/s1600/krebsbig.gif

  7. leo derosia

    What a phony egomaniac

  8. Max & Eric

    South Park nailed it, he is #2

  9. Wow AWD…

    That vidya is so damned funny. I can just imagine Jimmy’s thoughts….”Wow man, after all these years playing….THAT’S what chord progression means…thanks Edge, just wow, I mean thanks man, I’m gunna go try to join a band now.”

  10. So… Is it the LSD flashbacks or the dementia talking?

  11. Spurwing Plover

    Hey bonehead Bono why dont you and the rest of the sewer mouthed comedians go to ISIS and peronaly ask them nicely to stop persicutng christians and quit throwing gays off 25 story buildings or maybe bonehead needs hit over the head with a monkey wrench

  12. Disgusted Caucasian

    This asshole showed up on the White House steps several times during Bush 43. I hated him then just as much as I do now. Stay in Ireland you dick.

  13. Crankywhitewoman

    My Mister was born and raised in Belfast, Ireland. He remembers Bloody Sunday, and even lost a 15-year-old cousin to a British sniper’s bullet in 1981. (The boy was sitting on his porch when he was shot, and the ambulance carrying him to the hospital was stopped three separate times, twice by British soldiers, once by the Royal Ulster Constanulary mobile patrol. He died enroute to the hospital.) The Mister has lived in a war zone, and although there is peace now, it is an uneasy peace. He despises Bono because, as he says, “We have our own problems in Ireland, and this hack wants to help everyone but the Irish.”

  14. GrimmCreeper

    And take your shi**y songs that keep sabotaging my phone’s playlist with you.

    • Quartierleblanc

      Forgot about that. I got their crappy album automatically downloaded by iTunes for ”free” a while back and have had hell getting it off my playlist. I hated U2 before and really hate them now.

  15. My question is, how did a singer in a band ever rise to the position of being taken seriously by politicians? Mind you; they are mostly clowns themselves too!

  16. Bono is the usual show-biz idiot. Actors, actresses and musicians who haven’t even finished highschool are suddenly experts on everything because they are a ‘star’. People nowadays are so stupid that they think because someone is on television or plays an instrument on a recording, they are suddenly gurus and wise, holy people. In reality they are trash that got lucky. Actors and actresses are used to spread false doctrines like global warming because idiots believe them. They wouldn’t lie to their fans,….would they? In the past when people had some sense, actors and such were paid a living wage but were privately considered to be people of low standing. Why? Because they dealt in fiction and pretend. They did no real work. If they disappeared tomorrow no one would notice. With the advent of the colossal studios pushing their “stars” (especially during the depression whey people needed some mental relief) the pretenders got richer and richer simply through propaganda. Now…the presume to tell us how to live and they speak to parliaments and senates around the world. What fools run the earth!

  17. Oh really? A bit of comedy and/or laughing at them is all that is needed? Well okey, let’s give it a try!

    *ahem*

    Why do Muslims hate pigs yet screw goats? Because goats don’t squeal on them!

    What’s the difference between a Muslim and a vampire? Eventually, a vampire will stop being bloodthirsty!

    How does a Muslim shut his door?
    Islams it!

    What do you call a drunk Muslim? Mohammered!

    What do you call a Muslim on a toilet? Islamic Relief!

    What dose a Muslim train conductor say?Allah board!

    How do Muslim men start foreplay? They tickle the goat under the chin!

    Did you hear about the muslim party?
    It was a blast!

    Why don’t they teach Driver’s Ed and sex education on the same day in the Middle East? Simple, they don’t want to overtire camel!

    Why is there no Walmarts in Afghanistan? Because there is a target on every corner!

    Three men wanted to make phone call from Hell so as to remind to their relatives, still alive on earth, about how hard it is to be in hell.

    The first man is an American, the second an Italian and the third is an Iraqi. They paid a visit to the devil, who would allowed them to use his privet phone so long as they pay for it in advance.

    The American made a call and the Devil made him to pay 100 USD, next the Italian made a call and the Devil made him to pay 10 Euros on fact that Italy is less developed than that of USA. Finally, the Iraqi made a call and the Devil made him to pay a cent. Both the American and Italian complain as it is not fair and the devil responded to them “The Iraqi call was a local call whereas yours was an International call!”

    *checks the world news*

    Nope, ISIS is still killing everyone and those were my best jokes! Sorry Bono, you’re dead wrong!

  18. Spurwing Plover

    Hey Bonehead Bono How Mnay show biz wanks dose it take to screw in a light bulb? None their used to living in the dark

  19. Just remember “Bono” is short for “bonehead” As they say in Ireland,he is a bloody short arsed wanker.

  20. Spurwing Plover

    Herbie, I have been saying that all the time about Bono he is a bonehead

  21. At a recent U2 concert in Scotland, Bono stopped the band in mid song to slowly clap. Between each clap, he said, “each time I clap, a child dies in Africa!” after a while, someone shouted from the audience, “then stop fooking doing it then!”

  22. His mouth is bigger than his entire brain.

  23. Spurwing Plover

    A brain the size of a walnut all liberals have walnut sized brains

  24. Opinion’s are exactly like butt holes. If you pay little attention to either they begin to smell like shit. Hence this wonderful tripe from Bono.

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