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THERE’S A GOOD CHANCE I HATE YOU IF YOU DRIVE A CAR!

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DON’T BE EITHER ONE!

A little rant here. AWD rides a motorcycle. And if there’s one damn thing that chaps my big sexy bootay is people driving their damn cars when I’m on my Harley! Yes, chances are it’s YOU! Until you’ve ridden a bike, you have no idea how bad car drivers are.

A good friend of AWD who used to be a motorcycle cop says, “half the drivers don’t see you and the other half wants to kill you.” I believe that statement is too generous. I believe every car driver wants to kill me. So I plan accordingly and assume every car I see will run into me.

The most rude drivers? That award easily goes to white women. Usually in SUV’s. They would run over a long line of kittens rather than allow someone to pull into their lane! I had some cracka idjit woman last week speed up to keep me from merging when two lanes went to one. And I was in front of her!! I hate white women in cars when I’m riding! Don’t look for courtesy from these self-absorbed hags. You won’t find an ounce!

Foreigners. Their driving speaks for themselves. Most illegals come from Third World hellholes where owning a car is as common as Lindsey Graham taking a woman on a date! But here they are driving 20 mph lower than the speed limit, or driving 30 mph faster than the speed limit all the while texting one of their @#&* amigos! If a van load of 30 illegal painters isn’t dropping ladders off their van in front of me, they’re swerving all over because they’re texting!

Two days ago here, a drunk illegal pulled an illegal U-turn right in front of a 22 year old Marine and killed him. Not only was this asshole drunk, he shouldn’t have even been here! If they Mezcan gets parole, they’ll never see him again until he kills someone else. This country is so stupid.

Chinese. There’s a reason those little comm-a-nist spying bastids have been riding bicycles for billions of years over there. They can’t see out of a windshield! Or over the steering wheel. If you see a Chinese driver, start looking for a soft place in the asphalt.

Cali-@#&*ing-fornians! Damn I hate those people! They don’t follow traffic laws, are rude beyond belief, and just plain suck! I love California because it gives those rude jerkoffs a place to be other than Texas!

Not a day or two goes in North Texas that we don’t hear of another motorcycle rider killed by some drunk, texting, distracted car driver! I try to ride on back country roads where I will encounter fewer cars. But that’s not always possible.

Last August, a white woman in a @#*& Volvo acted as if she was turning right then immediately performed an illegal U-turn right in front of me. I couldn’t stop and crashed into the side of her stupid car. Luckily, I wasn’t hurt but was without my bike for two months for repairs. Grrrr!

Here’s some advice for car drivers when it comes to motorcycles:

1. Don’t tailgate us. Keep your distance. If you run into the back of a motorcycle, the rider is going to be, at the least, hurt.

2. If you see a bike behind you riding on your right or left, they are trying to see the road around your car, not pass you. Motorcycles can’t stop as fast as cars. So if there’s a ladder laying in the road, knowing what’s ahead gives a few more seconds to react. And it can save lives. Drive on the inside or outside of the lane and the biker will greatly appreciate it. They only want to see what’s in front of you and him.

3. Stay focused on driving. Especially if you’re a stupid idiot. Don’t text, put on makeup, look at your passenger, etc. It only takes a few seconds and a whole lot of people’s lives have been changed for the worse forever. I’m sure the parents of that young Marine are devastated forever.

4. Be courteous. Especially with motorcycles. You can have a wreck and not get hurt in a car. On a bike, you’re either hurt or dead. Let a biker in front of you. Don’t speed up like a jerk.

5. Don’t be a foreigner. If you live in the USA, try to learn courtesy. Except for white women, many Americans still practice courtesy. I realize the hellhole from where you came has no concept of courtesy and you and your fellow foreigners act like savages. But now you’re in America and must act better. First World, people!

I can tell you, many bikers I speak with are sick of this sh*t. You don’t want to get sideways with some pissed off guy on a Harley. It could get real ugly. I’ve seen where many are remembering license plates and looking up addresses. Word to the wise.

AWD is going up to Sturgis next week where I’ll have lots of open roads in front of me for some much needed wind therapy. Hopefully, I don’t see a single car all week. Just open roads, mountains, and boobs. Let me know if any Dudes or Dudettes are going. We might can just throw the houlihan up there!

If you’re in a car, don’t be a jerk. Don’t text. Don’t be a fuzzy little foreigner cab driver from Bangladesh, and don’t be a white woman! Stay the hell out of my way and stop swerving in my lane!

That reminds me of a song by Robert Earl Keen about the topic for some Music That Doesn’t Suck:

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