This is a post from AWD from a few years back. But it shows some things have not changed and perhaps never will.
Dallas could soon be on fire! Thousands of Dallas citizens protested the shooting and death of an unarmed white man (aka cracka) this week with numerous protests across the Metroplex. Andy Gaynier, 26, was tragically shot by Dallas police when he aggressively rushed a Dallas officer after being told to stay where he was. The shooting mirrors the Michael Brown shooting in St Louis, only this one won’t make the news. Gaynier is the wrong color and Democrats have quit trying to win back white voters.
The shooting of the unarmed white man has the entire Dallas white community enraged. To protest, thousands of Texans got up early and went to work today. Some of the more angry protesters made a point of being a few minutes late to the office and dared the Human Resources department to write them up!
Local Plano secretary Laurie Johnson said:
“No overtime, no peace! Hey hey, ho ho, it’s 5 o’clock and I have to go…to pick up the kids from soccer practice.”
When asked about the shooting of the unarmed white man, Johnson said:
“Well, he shouldn’t have rushed the police! What was he thinking? Stupid! But I’m sure he was a goot boy who ain’t never done nuffin’ wrong.”
Motorists all over the Metroplex could be seen driving down Central Expressway, the North Dallas Tollway, and 35 in a light rain and not turning on their headlights (as is the law!) in an open show of dangerous protest against the shooting. Such reckless behavior has never seen before from white people.
Dallas Police Chief Michael Igo said:
“We’ve never seen such lawbreaking from the white Dallas community! I mean, being late for work and driving in the rain without headlights all in one day! It’s the type of protest that can lead to other instances of lawbreaking such as not registering cars before expiration and driving with under pressured tires! It’s a very volatile situation!
A local Quik Trip convenience store manager in Richardson was nervous of the volatile situation growing throughout the morning drive. Especially after a Quik Trip store was looted and burned to the ground last week in St Louis over the police shooting of black teen Michael Brown. In Dallas, several white protesters were seen topping off their tanks with gasoline and letting a few extra drops splash to the ground, creating a tremendous environmental disaster that could last decades. Others spilled some of their Original Colombian coffee on the counter, creating extra work for the QT staff!
One man was visibly upset when the QT ran out of 32 ounce Styrofoam cups for his Diet Coke. He was overheard yelling out to store management:
“What do I want? A 32 ounce cup! When do I want it? Now! If that wouldn’t be too much of a problem.”
Home improvement stores Michaels and Hobby Lobby took extra precaution where the burning of stores was a distinct possibility in Plano. Protesting housewives with their children in tow went up and down aisles looking for scented candles in delicious scents like Papaya Punch, Candy Apple Orchard, and Fresh Summer Lemon Scent. Dallas Police had warned home stores about protesting trophy wives in McKinney buying ingredients for Molotov Votive candles.
Hobby Lobby protester Morgan Johnson said:
“This injustice will not stand! I left yoga class early and skipped Starbucks entirely with my tennis girlfriends to buy those cute little Papaya Punch candles for our pool party this weekend only to find they were sold out! I’m so enraged because I’m going to have cancel my mani/pedi to drive all the way to Frisco to find them! Maybe I can get Governor Abbott to open an investigation on this oppression! This will not stand!”
The protests are scheduled to continue tomorrow where a group of women are planning on taking over the Whole Foods coffee area to trade recipes for some delish garlic chicken that they can prepare in less than 30 minutes that they saw on Pinterest while discussing social injustice. They have even invites a few recent California transplants to discuss the homeless situation in Highland Park, where there is no homeless problem. Better to be prepared, they say!
Local officials are concerned with the never before seen levels of anger being seen from white people over the shooting of the unarmed white man and the lack of votive candles. They hope the enraged crackas will soon return to their daily lives and quit spilling coffee at the Quik Trip! The city appears to be at the breaking point!
Through a source, AWD has learned that Dallas Police is considering loading their guns with rubber earplugs to restore order. I’ll try to stay alive and safe to continue reporting the violent protests from the front lines at Bob’s Chop House with my 14 oz ribeye (medium rare, thank you) and a loaded baked potato with that yummy creamed spinach. It’s getting real, people!